Grandpa: “What can you tell me about Freyr?”

I was messaged by an Odinist friend via fb chat and we engaged in a lively discussion…until suddenly,  every time I responded to him, the message appeared:
“What can you tell me about Freyr?” repeatedly.

I thought it was a test…  The friend was from the Odin Brotherhood forums* so I kept going with increasing amounts of every ounce of information I knew on Freyr- I just kept going. Then I realized it was odd, it kept disappearing after I would type more, then reappear as a question again after I stopped.

Freyr is my grandma’s favorite God, she’s 84 years old and knows him as Janis in Latvian, I am thick-skulled, the conversation began at 10:30 and ended around 11:03 online when I gave up and called grandma. It was then she told me today was the anniversary of the death of my grandfather who died in 1979 (I was born 1982)….and it was near the time of his death.

Here is the conversation,  I thought the friend was “testing” me, so I was trying my best. Turns out, he was not the one asking “What can you tell me about Freyr?” repeatedly. After I would type my reply, the question would disappear. I did my best to reinsert where it was asked over and over of me. I could have written more on Freyr, but I realized things were getting odd and I had a strange feeling. I am glad I called my grandma.

Here is the conversation:

Friend: What can you tell me about Freyr?

Me: Sure! In Lettish, Freyr is Janīs.

Friend: What can you tell me about Freyr?

Me: He ushers in true summer by riding his flaxen-haired horse over the bonfire of each village. In Asatru, it is called Freyfaxi (my wedding anniversary) in Latvia, it is called Janī, but the traditions are near identical.

Friend: What can you tell me about Freyr?

Me: He is a kind, laughing God who gave up his blessed sword for love.
He is growing things, like all Vanir, the God of crops as they grow but not yet matured
His Sister Freyja brings Spring and the waking from winter, and the reaping is either Frigg, Frau Holle, or some say Hela and the Hunt.
The problem is every [Old Religion] family has their own unique understanding. I hope we don’t lose them. Our religion is best left a colorful quilt instead of a dull blanket of one weave.

Friend: What can you tell me about Freyr?

Even without a sword, he is a mighty warrior who does battle with an antler of a stag attached to a pole….
Tyr claims in the Lokisenna, “There is no better warrior” than Freyr.
Despite the existence of Thor, Magni, Modi, and Vidarr
Which suggest it isn’t strength alone that makes a Warrior…but love.
Both Frey and Freyja are Gods of love…but the accounts vary per culture.
In Deitsch, Frey is marital love, Freyja “free” love of youth.
But some ascribe that marital part also to Frigg
It gets confusing.
However….as I age, I grow more opposed to forcing Universalism. The Gods decide themselves how they wish to interact with us, our families, our histories, etc.
I believe limiting Them to only one, ‘universal’ interpretation takes away from understanding and learning to know them personally.
I hope I’m not too boring.

Friend: What can you tell me about Freyr?

I know Freyr because He chose my grandma. She married a soldier of Tyr.
I always believed Grandpa is a Tyrsman. 
My uncle should have been Heimdallrs, but left the Old Religion. My mother has no one. My father’s side is Woten/Donar/Loki/Holle/Frigg

Friend: What can you tell me about Freyr?

Me: Scroll up
He’s hairy, I don’t know him Deitsch, only Latvian and via the Eddas.
He has long, blonde, curly hair, a beautiful blonde beard, and is shorter than I see other male Gods. In Latvia, his symbol is the erect phallus.
Do you keep typing ” What can you tell me about Freyr?”
Or is that an error?

Friend: What can you tell me about Freyr?

Me: I’m trying!!! 🙂

Friend: What can you tell me about Freyr?

Me: O.o

Friend: What can you tell me about Freyr?

Me: Freyr is kind, gentle, and benevolent. He cares deeply and shows emotion freely.
It’s still repeating ” What can you tell me about Freyr?”
This is….odd.
This must mean something that the same message Keeps repeating. I promise I’ll call my grandma tomorrow😉
….and the message stopped when I wrote that…

Friend: Thank you. I felt the pull too.

Me: Talking to Grandma right now. She said Grandpa died today almost 40 years ago [It was now 11:30 pm] He died 1979…checking time of messages.
Crazy. It started right after his time of death
I’m glad you were here for this, my friend.

End conversation.

She asked him today to send her a sign he was still around, this was the fb conversation that lead to me calling her at 11pm at night, she was awake…actually putting on her nightgown just as she was the night she died. We stayed on the phone until almost midnight and I told her, “I guess this is how he wanted to tell you he is still around. I wouldn’t have called you so late without this happening on my computer.” I was thinking about him today, half my right arm tattoo is complete, but I promised the other half to Tyr and I thought of a design that both honored my grandfather and Tyr… Grandpa was an SS Lieutenant from Latvia. I have felt upset over the fact that in war, history records things as black and white, but without Germany, half my family would have been killed entirely by Stalin, if Germany won- the Baltic states would have been freed and they could have returned home to their remaining families.  Grandma would still have her farm, and I believe she would have met Grandpa and married him even more easily in such a small country since he lived in Riga- a place where my Grandma’s father traveled frequently.

My grandmother’s family was very kindly treated and sheltered in Germany while most of the rest of my ancestors and relatives died in Siberian death camps. My grandparents met in the US years later, married, and had my mother and uncle. Grandpa was listed as “assassinated” despite dying in a hospital of cancer. He had multiple names. I knew of him as Valdis Valdemars Meznora, I am told he also went by Valdamars Grinberga- prior to the movement of Latvians changing their surnames away from the ones given by Germany in the 1800’s to Latvian names. He may have been Latgalian, he knew the old religion, and was fluent in writing in runic, but I have not seen his writing.

I know very little about him except for anecdotes. My (now estranged) mother told me often as a child how much he would have “despised” or “hated” me if he were still living. When I was in college learning diplomacy, I had access to his records and did not know it was only a temporary window- so I have deep regret I did not take the time from my studies to learn more about him.

Now, I can find nothing. What I learned then is he began in the Latvian military which was then absorbed by the German military to keep back the Russian front. He tested well enough to become an SS officer, then defected and worked for the British Secret Service.  (But Grandma says he was a POW brick layer- both are likely true to some degree)

Something he did angered Britain… (Grandma said he tried to go back to Latvia to see his parents and was denied the opportunity)  and he was forced to move to the United States under operation paperclip under the false pretense he would still be able to continue a career in a military capacity- instead, he was trapped here and unable to leave until he was dying, and then, only to visit his sister in Canada.  In the US, he drove a bread truck of Latvian Rye bread and then became head of maintenance for a local hospital for his remaining years. He wanted to remain a military man, I was told he loved children- but never said “I love you”- I was told by grandma he would say “There is no point in saying it. if you do not feel that I do, I cannot convince you.”

He died young, in his 50’s, while my uncle and mother were teenagers.

I learned today he died in his hospital room this day in 1979. He was awake and conversational, paralyzed from the waist down after he lifted a motorcycle from his parking space days prior and the doctor would not allow him to leave “until he could walk”.  He died in the hospital in which he worked. The day he passed, he was discussing making modifications to the house he (we- I was raised there until age 12) lived in the day he died to his friend to  accommodate a wheel chair and was demanding to be released home that day. My grandmother received the call of his death in 1979 the same time I called her this evening.

Here is his picture of him in Britain, Grandma said he was a POW and a bricklayer.   What very little research I did accomplish stated he worked for them via MI6.  If this is true, he was truly a brilliant man.

Grandpa

Grandpa in Britain on one of his motorcycles.  He had a collection I am told.  (Not very POW of him)  I keep this picture on my bookshelf with a statue of Tyr

In an era prior to caller ID or cell phones, he always “knew” if my grandmother was in trouble and would wait by the phone at work for her to call, or call himself- and was always accurate.

I was also told, like myself, he spent years exploring every religion imaginable while in the US.  Grandma said he was “looking for something”- but she did not know what.  She didn’t feel comfortable is churches or other religious institutions that were not Latvian-  I suggested it was because she was already “sure of her beliefs” being raised to honor the old Gods and what she now calls “the other religion” (Christianity)… and perhaps, he had a mystical experience of a God he could not explain or sought to learn more of.

I am extraordinarily proud of her for being openly Dievturiba (Old Religion) … she is one of the main reasons I am still encouraged to stay within the Heathen community and write.  She translates her books from Latvian on the Gods, and I share the information here when she does.

I would like to end by saying this:  Simply because my grandfather was once an SS officer does not automatically make him a “bad man”, nor does it mean I support any of the atrocities of war.  What needs to be CLEARLY understood is my own family experienced a genocide by Stalin that is seldom spoken of in the United States- and those of my blood who went to Siberia, very few returned leaving less than 700 full-Latvian, Dievturiba practitioners left in the entire world today.

I am only half-Latvian, I do not speak more than a handful of words and my mental condition makes it difficult to recall the languages outside of English I was once either barely to conversationally fluent  (German, Farsi, French, and Spanish, in order of fluency).

Being in a military, any military- and trying to protect your people and your homeland is honorable, regardless of how history paints it afterwards.  We have not found any negative history on him- he was adaptable, and if he were truly the archetype of “evil nazi”- then why would he have worked for Britain and then sought to work for the United States intelligence and military?

I honor him as adaptable, clever, and deeply caring and intelligent.  I have no other explanation for what happened this evening other than that my greatest association with Freyr is Grandma, and he would not stop asking the question until I called her to check on her.

She’s 84. I was honestly scared it was a message something had happened to her since she is my closest connection to everything I’ve learned on Freyr/Janis and she is currently the relative to which I am closest emotionally.

End note. I don’t think my Grandfather hates me if he wanted me to call Grandma to see if she was okay on the anniversary of his death which I never knew prior.  What little I know of his temperament is he valued honesty above all else, he was very intelligent, fluent in multiple languages, spoke with a British accent, was very handsome, and quite psychic.

I wish I met him while he still lived among us.

Maybe he was not a Tyrsman after all, perhaps, like Grandma, he was of Janis (Freyr).

*Note:  Although I contribute to the forums, I do not have the right to call myself a member.  I have not completed the rites as stated in the book “The Odin Brotherhood” by Mark Mirabello, and sadly, I have foot surgery scheduled this Friday and will miss yet another solstice to recovery.  Please read the book;  It’s very good.

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6 Responses to “Grandpa: “What can you tell me about Freyr?””

  1. This is amazing!
    Wishing good luck with your surgery and fast recovery! 🙂

  2. adversary88@lumail.lu Says:

    Greetings,Lokean.I have been getting your excellent posts for some time now,and I must say that this one definitely required a response. It is by far the best I’ve seen yet. Your Grandfather,and Grandmother are/were,incredible people,and you have every right to be very proud of your Grandfather for all he accomplished,and all that he did! It is just a fact,that MOST of the Waffen SS were Foreign Volunteers,eager to join the fight against the Communist monstrosity. That force is recognized even today,and by nearly every professional military in the world, as the Elite,the Creme de la Creme of all units in contemporary memory. And that he was a believer in the Olden Gods and Goddesses is the icing on the cake…I have learned much from your Work,and this post was especially great,especially moving to me. I am grateful for this! Thank you,Friend,please keep the Great Work that you so diligently do. DS

    • Tyrienne Says:

      That was certainly some glowing commentary! You are exceptionally well spoken and educated in your communication- might you be interested in assisting me in uncovering more information on my grandfather? 🙂

  3. historian Says:

    A little history note for the eastern front, for the formation of fighting units, the formation and administration fell within the remit of the ss field divisions, which were separate in many ways from the personal bodyguard, the camp guard and other less than savoury units. Their main focus was field combat against the Russians, (in the eastern front) units were formed from local volunteers, there were cases such as in the Balkans where regional old politics took precedence for locally raised units, but on the whole they were watched closely and not entirely trusted by command, which is why they usually stayed on the eastern front. Most volunteers weren’t Nazis, they just made a choice when faced by the Russians. Around 5000 former ss soldiers (non Nazi party) were relocated after the war by allied forces, both to prevent reprisal massacres and also in some cases for exploitation of training. The classification of former pow’s into Various threat categories gave paratroops(fallschirmnjaeger) and all ss regardless of former duty the highest threat level, barring them from many roles including military (unless you were a scientist or engineer). With a name and unit you can apply to the German records for details, and there are several good (non political) history books available.

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